Giggle, giggle, snort

Usually the ticker to the right calmly explains what is going on with the baby. For example, it might state, "your baby's bones are forming," or "your baby's eyes are open."

Today, it exclaimed, "the tail is gone!"

For some reason, the simple little exclamation point made me laugh. It was like the ticker was just waiting to make this proclamation.

Obviously, we'd love Munchkin even if s/he had a tail. But I'm glad that s/he won't have this hanging over his/her head.

....or more specifically, off of his/her backside :-)

Hamsa

That's has been my mantra (literally) for the past couple of days. My nurse says this whenever our day becomes particularly crazy and I've started to pick up the habit. Try it one day....breathe in with a big Ham (hahm)...and breathe out with a big Sa (sah)...don't you feel relaxed? Yeah, me neither. Never hurts to try, though. It worked for the gal who wrote Eat, Pray, Love but she also spent four months studying yoga at an ashram in India so I think she had a head start on the whole meditation and relaxation thing. Anyway....

I've been really nervous about this appointment. Edward/Alex, on the other hand, has been cool as a cucumber and has been telling me that I have nothing to worry about. It's a good thing he is the way he is. We'd be in a whole mess of trouble if we were both neurotic.

Today was our first appointment with our midwife. Edward/Alex was slightly traumatized by part of the exam (I don't think he had seen a speculum before), but overall it went really, really well. I thought they would just listen for the heartbeat with the little hand-held doppler, but they actually performed a quick ultrasound to confirm Munchkin's due date. S/he is growing a few days ahead but looks great! This time s/he was flipping and flopping all around and waving those little arms all over the place.


Top picture: Head is to the left, Munchkin is facing you. Elbows are bent with the hands by the face. Legs are curled up and you can't see those very well. If you turn it sideways it looks a bit like the painting "The Scream" by Edvard Munch.

Bottom picture: Mid-flip. Munchkin is twisting on his/her side with arms pointing downward.



We're not technically out of the first trimester, but we felt comfortable giving our parents the go-ahead to start spreading the word. At this point, there really is no perfectly safe time to tell people, and all looks well at this point.

The midwifery group I will be seeing delivers in the hospital. While I'm not against home births when appropriate, Edward/Alex and I didn't see that as a good option for us. Also, midwives aren't legally allowed to attend home births in Maryland.

We chose to go with the midwives primarily because we wanted the pregnancy to be treated as a natural process, not a medical illness. It was enough to go through the fertility treatments. Now that I'm pregnant, we want to trust that my body will do what it's supposed to, when it's supposed to. Or at least we'd like to try to take that approach!

The midwives are trained to know what's normal. When anything strays from the normal, they call in the OB to evaluate the situation. So...we're not going to be left hanging if things don't happen as they should. But, unless there is need for concern, I don't need anyone turning up the dial on my anxiety unnecessarily.

I have never given birth so I have no way of knowing how I will respond to the pain of childbirth. That said, I would like to try to give birth without an epidural if possible. To be perfectly honest, it's all about maintaining a shred of control. If I don't have to be numb from the waist down, I can chose to labor while walking around, in the tub, on the birthing ball...whatever seems to work. If I have an epidural then I'm stuck on my back in the bed. If I need the epidural, the midwives don't have a problem with it. But they also aren't going try to pressure me into getting one.

Lastly, if I do have to have a C-section, it will be because Munchkin or I need a C-section in order for the birth to be as safe as possible. It won't be because I'm being pressured into it. When I was on my OB/Gyn rotations, I saw a lot of OBs pushing for C-sections simply because they wanted to get the show on the road. I'm really hoping I don't have to have a C-section, though. Again...it's about maintaining at least some control. I do not see myself taking kindly to being strapped down to a table while someone surgically removes my baby without me being able to see the birth.

Regardless of how Munchkin comes into the world, the midwife will be there to support us during labor, and will also be there to help with bonding and breast feeding afterward. It really does seem like the best of all worlds, so I'm happy with our decision.

Book Festival

10 weeks! I'm starting thicken out a bit. It's hard to say if it's because Munchkin has been so hungry or just because I'm getting fluffier all on my own. Either way, I'm starting to realize that there is a little more of me to fit into my clothes each morning.

I wandered on down to the National Book Festival yesterday. I've wanted to go for the last couple of years but something has always come up. I was able to hear both Isabel Allende and Diana Gabaldon speak. I have several dozen "favorite" authors, and they are two of them. I really enjoyed it. My plan was to stay and have Diana Gabaldon sign her latest book for me. Munchkin had other plans, though.

1) Munchkin did NOT like to ride the Metro. I barely made it to the Mall without getting sick, and I knew I had to get back.

2) It was HOT. And crowded. And the long lines in the even hotter, more crowded tents weren't doing me any favors. When I realized that Diana Gabaldon wasn't signing books until a couple of hours after she spoke, I knew I wasn't going to be able to hang around.

3) I needed to eat something or I was going to pass out. I brought some carrot sticks (I never travel without something in my purse these days), but they were only going to get me so far. And Munchkin emphatically did not want me to eat a hot, greasy, fried whatever-was-being-offered-at-the-festival and get back on the Metro.

So, I had to head home. Luckily, though, a friend from work went down and got the book I lent her signed by Isabel Allende for me....wasn't that nice of her? I owe her big time.

To say that I'm a voracious reader is a bit of an understatement. One of the things I'm most looking forward to is reading to Munchkin. We all used to read to my brothers when they were little and it was a lot of fun. In fact, I will probably have to make a concerted effort to make sure the baby has enough clothes when he/she comes...I'm much more likely to buy too many children's books and forget about things like keeping him/her from going naked!

9 weeks!

We're 9 weeks with child today! I'm headed into the third month, and so far everything is going well.

I'm still really, really fatigued. I'm starting to wonder if Edward/Alex would even recognize me if I weren't horizontal on the couch or zombie-walking through the house trying to get ready to go to work. Beatnik (one of our cats, for those who haven't met him) even acts surprised when he sees me moving around. The other day he kept pawing at my head...I think he was trying to make sure his food source was still alive. I was plenty sleep deprived, stressed, and worn out when I was going through rotations for PA school, but this is a whole new ball game. I'm hoping that the rumors that the energy should return in the 2nd trimester are true.


On the other hand, my morning sickness hasn't come back, so I really feel like I've lucked out.

We go for our first appointment with the midwife in 2 weeks. I'm really anxious to hear that heartbeat so that I know Munchkin is doing well. I was somewhat tempted to order a home doppler so that we could check for the hearbeat at home, but I decided that was a bad idea. If I tried to use it and was unsuccessful at hearing the heartbeat (either because I tried a little too early or just because I didn't know what I was doing), I would FREAK OUT. We're just not going to go there.

I did make one early purchase for Munchkin. It's a Mei Tai carrier that I've been eying. I was doing a lot of baby-related research long before we were pregnant and decided that I wanted to try this type of carrier. It keeps the kid in a sitting position and supports the hips rather than making them hang from the crotch like a lot of carriers. Plus, it's easy to wad up and pack in a bag, and can be used for several different types of carries. And no, it's not the type of "sling" that has been in the news. Plenty of carriers are safe when used correctly...it's the cradle holding slings that can pose problems. I've done my research, I promise.

I was going to give it a whirl with one of the cats, but Edward/Alex vetoed that idea pretty quickly!

Munchkin's Auntie Adria sent us a very cute little outfit the other day. As she said, Munchkin won't go naked with Auntie A. around!

So, all's well in the womb today. I'll post more later about some of the projects I'm hoping to work on, why we chose to go with a midwife, etc later on.

The Tiniest Tarheel

These booties were sent my my Mom...what a sweet gift! It's hard to believe we're going to have a little one with such little feet soon!

Yesterday, we browsed around a baby store to get an idea of what we were going to need for Munchkin. I have to say, that I'm not a fan of the huge, clunky, dark cribs that seem to be so popular right now. Is everyone raising a baron or baroness these days? What happened to whimsy?

I've found some bedding that I really like. Since we're likely going to wait and find out the baby's sex once he/or she is born, we need something that can be used for either. This has a blue background, but it's a soft blue (with a little green) and I think it could work for a girl as well as a boy. I like the animal and alphabet theme...we can decorate with various stuffed animals and animal prints. I have to admit that I saw some cute mama and baby animal prints when we were in Alaska and I bought a couple for a future nursery!


I like these animal prints (below), but my designer of a husband is a bit hung up on the fact that they are a bit clashy with the bedding. He said he could design something similar...that would be awesome, and if he does so before 5-6 months gestation then Munchkin will have some custom art. Otherwise, we may be introducing a few more colors into the room...gasp! We haven't committed to anything yet, so feel free to give suggestions!

It may be a bit early to be looking at this kind of thing, but Ed/Alex keeps reminding me that the time will fly by faster than I think. Plus, he needs time to look everything up on Consumer Reports and analyze what we need vs. what we might like vs. what's the best deal, etc.

We had a good time imagining having Munchkin around. It was a long day, though! This first trimester fatigue has hit me harder than I ever thought it would. It's not a sleepy kind of tired...it's more of a whole body weariness. It's like everything from my elbows to my earlobes are crying out for a nap. Of course, that's not going to happen at work, and when I actually go to sleep at night it's rarely a restful night. I'm hoping that I get my energy back soon.

Gummy Bear

Our baby looks less like a chicken nugget and more like a gummy bear (squint a little...now look at it out of the corner of your eye...there...see it?). Munchkin passed today's ultrasound with flying colors. Munchkin's heart was beating away at 156 bpm, and the crown-rump length (CRL) was right on track at 14.6 mm.


We officially "graduated" from the fertility clinic. I have to admit that I'll miss being so closely monitored and cared for, but I'm also excited to be able to approach this pregnancy like most other moms from this point forward.

Our first official OB appointment isn't until October 1st. I can't wait to hear Munchkin's little heartbeat for the first time. Up to this point, we can see it on the screen but we haven't been able to hear anything.

Telling the family!

So, we've told the grandparents-to-be, as well as the auntie and uncles-to-be on my side. We're waiting to tell Bill and Mason until we get their gifts in the mail. Everyone seemed to be pretty excited. I know that there was also a sense of "well it's about time," not unlike when we announced we were getting married! It certainly wasn't for lack of effort or tears, though. We've been (not so patiently) waiting for this to happen ourselves.

We go in for another ultrasound tomorrow. I'm super nervous again. I haven't had any morning sickness for over a week and, for some reason, I'm fixated on that. I need to just be glad that I'm not feeling so puny anymore. The fatigue is plenty!